Wednesday, December 19, 2007

now entering...

the beginning of the last... Today marks the 1st day of fatigue & pain for Florian. However. This is the last time we have to go through this - at least for now :)

Florian finished his Prednizone yesterday; today was day 1 of Neupogen. Tonight he is already feeling the side effects with bone pain (hip and thigh). He came home from work very tired; took 1/2 hour to lie down while I worked on dinner.

I am afraid of the next two weeks - with each consecutive treatment the fatigue & bone pain & muscle cramps have not only been making their presence known earlier in the cycle but also have been somewhat more severe. Inwardly I am cringing at what I know lies ahead... I have to be strong for him... but from where will I find that strength? I'm tired - but not nearly as tired as he is. Emotionally I feel like I am falling apart - who will hold me together?

I know the answer - As I lift up my eyes to the hills — where does my help come from My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let my foot slip — he who watches over me will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The LORD watches over me — the LORD is my shade at my right hand; the sun will not harm me by day, nor the moon by night. The LORD will keep me from all harm — he will watch over my life; the LORD will watch over my coming and going both now and forevermore.*

I am thankful for the peace that comes as I, once again, take my cares & concerns and lay them down at the feet of the One who cares for me (1 Pet 5:7).

Practically, I am also thankful that aside from 2 Christmas gifts left to purchase we are basically ready for Christmas.

* Ps 121:1-8, New International Version (Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society)


Lee said...

I'm so sorry you all are walking thru the shadows right now. Yes, you are strong, but nobody can fight's a wonderful gift to be able to ask for help and lean on others. Please know that even from afar, you have friends lifting you up! 'Throw your burdens upon the Lord and He will sustain you. He will never let the righteous totter.'

Diane Noble said...

Just wanted to "check in on you" before heading to bed. Somehow I thought I needed to connect to see if there were specific prayer needs. I'm thankful God led me here tonight so I can lift you up. "And my God will meet all your needs according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus." (Phil. 4:19) I will pray that He will strenthen you, refresh you spritually and physically; that He will encourage your heart, and comfort you, and that through this night "He will cover you with His feathers, and under His wings you will find refuge; His faithfulness will be your shield and rampart." (Ps 91:4) May you wake up knowing that God touched you.

thinker said...

Lee, thank you for always finding the right words that bring encouragement. You are a real gem!!

thinker said...

Diane, thank you so much for your prayers & love & support. I am in tears as I write... thank you for obeying the Spirit's promptings... God is good.

Suzanne said...

I can only echo what both Lee and Diane have already said. They did it so well. As you know that God will care for you and Florian and will provide you both with all you need to move through the next weeks; also know that you are in the thoughts and prayers of many around the whole world! Also the next few days when you are tempted to give in to exhaustion or despair look to the star of Bethlehem and find the babe....he will be your strength.