it's been 8 months. . .

since Florian left us. In so many ways it feels like just the other day... and yet it also feels a lifetime ago. If I think about what's ahead 8 months from now, that puts us into March. That's a long time down the road...

So much has happened and I've had to deal with so very much. It's not always been easy. In fact, the last few months have been unbelievably hard.

I've just come through another one of life's major milestones - the marriage of my 2nd oldest. It was a beautiful celebration and I am so deeply grateful. I believe that God was honoured and that brings incredible peace & joy.

I'm grateful to have friends & family who helped keep things in perspective - who helped me figure things out. Things like what is worth fighting for... you know how it's about picking your battles? Well, there certainly were many opportunities these last months for that!! All the while, they were there lending their support... letting me know that they cared... letting me know that I wasn't alone - they were there, standing in the trenches alongside. I am so blessed and grateful for these dear ones.

I'm grateful for the moments during the celebration when we were able to honour Florian. The lighting of the candle at the start of the ceremony - Chris stopped at the table and lit it before taking his place on the platform. In his opening remarks, the pastor explained that it was lit to pay tribute to the groom's dad. And then the tribute paid in memory of Florian - a toast given by the bride's father - what a great gesture on their part. I didn't expect it but I sure appreciated it. Both were especially meaningful for me.

As I think about the whole day, I know that God graced us with His presence - and what greater gift could I ask for? I had prayed that the entire celebration would be honouring to Him and tried to ensure that I came to it also with an attitude that would be pleasing & honouring to Him. I encouraged the couple to do likewise. And in the end, it was a great day. Not only did I survive, but I think I can honestly say that I 'did good'. It certainly wasn't about me and what I was able to do. It was only because of His strength and the prayers of many who were praying for me that I was able to hold out with joy and graciousness. I am humbly grateful. To God be all the glory.